Friday Stuff and items

1) Remember how this happened?

And then this happened?

Well, now this has happened ...

We should just institute a uniform and be done with it. Now... I wonder what that should look like...?

2) Neil Gaiman says fiction is a gateway drug. We reckon if you mainline Neil Gaiman, you'll be on the way to a full-blown fiction addiction. Eeeexcellent.

3) You know we love Our Colleague Jarvis Cocker. Well here he is reading Seamus Heaney's poem 'Digging'. This Onion spent most of Year Twelve studying Seamus Heaney, and studying Jarvis Cocker - so this is something of a ... moment.

Friday stuff and items

 1) It's spring in Melbourne. We can tell by how it was 30 degrees and windy yesterday, followed by an impressively dramatic temperature drop, which made it rawther chilly overnight.*

via our helpful friends at the School of Earth Sciences 

But the most telling piece of evidence is how everyone is swearing at the plane-tree fluff.

Also, in other Melbourne spring news: don't forget that DAYLIGHT SAVING starts this weekend. HOORAY! BOOOOO! **

This has been a public service announcement.
  
2) This Twilight: Breaking Dawn part 2 poster - it's just really really funny somehow.

3) It's Friday. What would you like to be doing best? Going on a 'sonic journey' as our colleague  Jarvis Cocker reads a passage from Heart of Darkness accompanied by cellist Philip Sheppard? Thought so.

4) For $395,000 you can buy Ingleside. INGLESIDE! Surely we need a Canadian office, don't we Mothership? We promise to leave at least one Onion  to run the Melbourne office. We were always a bit suss on her anyway.



* Don't pack away these winter doonas just yet, people. You don't want to freeze in the fickle Melbourne spring.
** The onset of Daylight Savings is guaranteed to ever and always divide the night-owls from early-birds.

Wednesday stuff and items

 

1)  The Queen has a dog called Gryffindor!

2)  We have just taken possession of some very exciting advances.

3) And we have died and gone to heaven, or, to put it anther way, our Faber colleague Jarvis Cocker reads Oliver Jeffers.* 

*There is an unconfirmed report that in the late nineties one Onion handmade a T-shirt that said JARVIS across the... well ... the chest area, in large fuzzy letters. But she didn't wear it to the Pulp concert at Festival Hall, because that would have been deeply uncool. If Mr Cocker ever visits our offices as part of being generally AT LARGE, we will scrub this footnote, pretend it never happened and lounge in doorways trying to look sophisticated and largely uninterested.