21 December 2012

Happy Christmas, Happy Holidays, Happy New Year!

Today is our* last day in the office for the year.
As of tomorrow we will be lounging about, or cooking, or shopping, or reading, or swimming, or cleaning, or panicking, or picnicking - and generally BEING ON HOLIDAYS.
Thank you all so much for reading and commenting and being part of our community in 2012. We've had a lovely time.
Here's a little wrap-up of our year in the form of...
Things Overheard in the House of Onion**
'It's bad, but it's not bad. It's just normal bad.'

'Did you get my email? The email offering you money? For your new book?'

'You're an excellent, excellent person.'

'I don't care. I mean, it's not that I don't care, but I actually don't care.' 
'If necessary, we'll Photoshop some clothing over that.'

'I just need to remember sometimes that I'm not a machine.'

'I'm scared that when I get to his house I'll just kiss him.'

'There's no rest for the extremely bad.'

'Staying calm. Staying perfectly calm.'

'I'll just do this. You just sit there staring into space.'

'I'll just sit cheek-by-jowl with you. Which is your cheek and which is your jowl?' > 'It's hard to tell, they're both the same.'
'Let's do it your way, not the way I would prefer to do it.'

'Good morning!' > 'Yeah, I said that to you when I walked in an hour ago.'

'Do you think this is deliberate?' 
 'THANK YOU! You are a lady among ladies.'
'Is that someone's lunch burning?'

'I had never heard of that Gosling person before you sent me all those blog things.'

'The dogs have doodles. Do we de-doodle them?'

'Why do you people have to keep publishing books?'

'If you hear my mobile ringing, it's just telling me where my bag is.' 
'That editorial report. I have finished it. FINISHED. Now I am paralysed and I can't press send.'

'Resonate on the frequency where serenity resides.' 
'Why on earth are you still working? Stop it immediately. It's wine time!'


* And by 'our' we mean the two or three suckers still left.
** As recorded by a sneaky scribe throughout the year.


Pris Gormley said...

Did you de-doodle the dogs?

Sadami said...

Oh, Onions,
Thank you very much for your hard work. I really enjoyed the blog and picked up many elegant expressions and brilliant humour. Please keep up. Have a wonderful and safe holiday season.
Best wishes, Sadami

Sally Rippin said...

This makes me wish I worked in an office. An Alieny-oniony kind of office. xxx